I'm hungry...

We are with our sweet little angel.    He's trying to sleep, we wish he could sleep from now until the morning.   Quite a few tears and hoarse attempts to tell us that he is very hungry and thirsty.   His throat is hurting him more than anything else, and they have bumped up his pain medicine because they want him breathing well on his own and it makes him so drowsy.

I had tried to prepare myself for all of the tubes.    And the difficulty of coming out of anesthesia.   But I can't lie.   This is really hard.   It's close to impossible to listen to his little cries and know how scared he is.   He keeps looking for me (I'm behind him) but he gets much more upset and short of breath when he sees me.   So I am trying to let the nurse help him first.


He is scared and wants to know why he can't eat or drink.

This won't last forever.   I prayed and prayed that he would be healed.  And that he would safely make it through the surgery.  It is so much for his little body.   Wow, if I could take it all away from him I would.

We are relying on God's strengh right now.  What I really want to do is scoop him up in my arms and hold him.   Kiss his forehead a million times.    And I am hoping by the morning that he will be more alert and calm, and we can be righ nex to him without upsetting him so much.   He keeps turning and looking to see that we are here.   Our nurse, Carrie, is wonderful, and keeps telling me that she knows how hard it is to sit back.   But it does seem to help him stay calm if I am not right there.

On another note - the nurse asked me when I was due, and commented that they are such a good distance apart ... great timing for having a second with Jackson just about to turn five years old.   HA!   If you can imagine her face when I said that he had two little brothers.    : )

Keep praying for him.    Please pray that his heart is calm and he can rest tonight.    I know that when we look back it will have gone by so quickly. 

It was crazy to me that from when he woke up this morning until 2:30 when he went in to surgery he hadn't eaten a thing.  He only once asked (around 2:00), "Hey mommy ... are we having lunch in the hospital?"     Now he is begging for food.   Just hoping he can go to sleep and wake up in he morning when he can eat.